New Beginnings

NOTE (2023-07-26): The forum I mention in this is no longer active - sorry!

Afternoon my luvvers. These next few days are going to be very, very exciting.

First of all, it seems like I have developed a habit of getting super drunk and then immediately diving deeper down the new old web rabbithole. Which is a very long and convoluted way of saying, I made a forum! It's right here and it would be super cool to say hi to you there. It's a little overwhelming to be honest, but hopefully it'll make a fun alternative to Discord since I don't necessarily want to make yet another failed server of my own there. Forums have a little more longevity in that respect I think. So uh, yeah! Make an account and let's get chatting!

In terms of my actual life, I have my first ever pride parade tomorrow which is going to be pretty dope. I've wanted to go since I was 12 but circumstances mean I haven't been able to until now. It's hopefully going to be awesome! I'll catch you guys up afterwards.

Also, I'm starting my first ever full time job tomorrow! It's in childcare which is a little unnerving, and it's a big step for a nervous kid like me, but I'm looking forward to making some money and gaining some experience. I'll also be sure to let you know how that goes.

I suppose the message hidden in all this is that sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone. For normal people, that means it's ok to be a little scared sometimes. For overly anxious people like me, it means that sometimes you have to plunge right into the terror in order to make any progress. And sometimes that terror means you're moving in the right direction. I keep thinking about one particular situation that happened about this time two years ago. I was stepping into my new sixth form building for the first time for an interview. I'd never been there before and I couldn't find the reception desk. I began to panic, and instinctively I was going to run back to my mum in the car. But for the first time in my life, I was able to clamp down on that fear and I decided to keep walking. I found the reception desk, made a great impression on the head of sixth form and got in! That school, and therefore that experience, completely turned my life around. And since then I've been looking for places in my life to push through that fear.

- Blue